酷儿们

On November 13th 1895 I was brought down here from London. From two o'clock till half-past two on that day I had to stand on the centre platform of Clapham Junction in convict dress and handcuffed, for the world to look at. I had been taken out of the Hospital Ward without a moment’s notice being given to me. Of all possible objects I was the most grotesque. When people saw me they laughed. Each train as it came up swelled the audience. Nothing could exceed their amusement. That was of course before they knew who I was. As soon as they had been informed, they laughed still more. For half an hour I stood there in the grey November rain surrounded by a jeering mob[135d]. For a year after that was done to me I wept every day at the same hour and for the same space of time. That is not such a tragic thing as possibly it sounds to you. To those who are in prison, tears are a part of every day’s experience. A day in prison on which one does not weep is a day on which one’s heart is hard, not a day on which one’s heart is happy.1 8 9 5年1 1月1 3日，我从伦敦被带到这里。

那天从两点到两点半，我得站在克列珀汉转换站的中央站台上，穿着囚衣戴着手铐，让天下人观看。

一点也没预先通知，就把我从医院病房带出来。

天上人间，那时就数我最丑最怪。

人们看到我就笑。

每来一班火车就增加一层观众。

没什么比这更能逗他们乐了。

这当然是在他们知道我是谁之前。

等知道了之后，他们笑得更厉害了。

我就这么半个小时地站在那里，冒着十一月的冷雨，面对一团讥笑连连的匹夫匹妇。

在那次遭遇后的一年里，每天到了那个钟点，我都要哭，哭上同样长的那么一段时间。

这事你听着也许不觉得有那么悲伤。

对那些监狱中人，眼泪是每日必备的经历。

在牢里，要有谁哪一天不哭，那是他的心硬了，而不是他的心喜了。

在朋友告诉我麦哥和小本合作了一部叫做queers的时候我的第一反应是"还有比这个更gay的事吗"......然后发现果然是讨论LGBT平权问题的片子。

作为一个多年的英剧粉我不得不说英国影视圈本身就是一部波澜壮阔的LGBT平权运动史......优秀的gay片真的一抓一大把不是gay片的也几乎一定要卖个腐（BBC America的Dirk Gently居然凑了男二女一cp而不是男一男二cp编剧脑子一定是进水了......）......已经出柜的优秀影人也是真多啊2223在此可以列个小清单。

Maurice. Tipping the Velvet. Vicious. Fingersmith. 英剧迷们一定要去看。

言归正传......首先全独白的表现形式真的很大胆。

如果演员演技不够或者内容无聊很容易让观众弃剧。

从演技上来讲有网友吐槽除了小本以外其他人基本都是舞台剧演法，但我个人认为偏夸张的舞台剧演法其实更适合独白。

英剧和美剧的最大差别便是美剧更贴近生活而英剧更贴近艺术。

而从内容上来讲，麦哥对这几个故事的选择还是非常到位的，情节和台词写的也很漂亮。

（虽然有一两集的语言和文化包袱太重了。

）缺点是对lesbian和bisexual的coverage不足。

居然没有请到Andrew Scott有点失望啊......人见人爱的莫娘......E1除了极小众的Nathan Barley以外我居然没看过Ben Whishaw其它的作品也算是人生一大缺憾。

当时看了张照片就爱上了......话说小本军装胡子的造型不美啊!故事讲的非常细腻,在此不多提了。

A certain liquidity in the eyes让我想到冰火里描写百花骑士liquid golden eyes; 话说麦哥和马丁你俩的gaydar构造是一样的吗?E3前半段本来觉得是个很无味的故事。

演员梗几乎完全没有get到。

抛弃HIV阳性的男友诚然是一般人会做出的理智选择，为此做道德评判并不应该，但是正因为太平凡太理智了也失去了看点。

然而结尾处演员的愤怒却打动了我。

当少数群体得不到应有的保护。

当同性恋被无端和AIDS挂钩。

两分钟的独白成就了一集好剧。

E4Alice真的是个很乐观很可爱的妹子啊。

有一个私生子的过去涉及到荡妇羞辱？

所以公婆选择她作为同妻，因为反正她也是被人搞过的破鞋？

E5Ian Gelder老爷子是个意外的惊喜啊！

酒红色的骚气西装，花枝招展的做派......老爷子居然这么不火......唯一值得一提的是演过GOT里的Kevan Lannister了.......对于年轻人、宗教和战争的吐槽都好搞笑啊！

虽然语言文化包袱重了点。

如果世间真的有天堂，它就在地上。

我见过上帝。

他是我爱上的一个美国士兵。

老爷子卖得一手好贱，吐得一口好槽。

E6更多涉及到racism而非LGBT问题。

如果不讨论少数民族问题是相当无味的一集。

黑人小哥演技一般。

然而一定程度上的政治正确还是必要的。

意外精彩的BBC纯独白剧集没有背景音乐 没有场景画面 只有一个人坐在面前讲述每集都只有十几分钟但却都是十分深入内心的故事 代入感强到可以让我缓半天 因此也花了将近半个月的时间去细细品味每一个故事每位演员从神态到语调到肢体无不彰显细节台本用词也很考究 常常让人停下回味或是查词典从LGBT角度分析 剧中包含近代以来英国该群体外部生存环境改善的许多重要时间节点 在关注故事的同时也了解了人文历史 故事本身也都具有一定深度个人来说真的太爱了 很英国 很BBC最后为Fantopia字幕组打call 包含摘要式时间点相关背景介绍 以及地道双语字幕 剧末的滚动字幕也完全打动我

剧末滚动字幕（1）

剧末滚动字幕（2）片尾钢琴曲也百听不厌 必须五星～

我刚刚看了第一集，本喵视角，讲述一战中两个青年Perce和Captain Leslie的故事。

看完之后我就忍不住看了第二次。

因为第一次看的过程中我一直在想，哎哟喂，如果我的英文再好一点就好了，完全不想把视线从本喵的脸上移开。

为什么以前我从来不知道，讲述者的演技在一部纪录片里担当着如此重要的角色？

但是话说回来，《Queers》又是一部别开生面的纪录片。

它那么温暖，那么美好，那么...不冷静不客观，想想仿佛是我看过的最含情脉脉的纪录片。

暖黄色的灯光打在本喵的侧脸上，他时而压抑时而兴奋时而悲伤到难以控制的眼光透过镜头望向我们。

一场独白仿佛成了亲密老友间的呢喃。

他细细地述说着Perce1895年在火车站月台眼见着王尔德因为“与其他男性发生有伤风化的行为”被捕的场面。

眼神的对接让他们一瞬间看清了彼此，他惊惧，他害怕自己最后落得同样的下场。

在那个恐同的年代，他与Captain Leslie的恋情注定无法善终。

但是故事的结尾，他又来到了火车站，见到了在月台上站着的Captain。

在一片黑暗之中，他握住了Perce的手，放到嘴边细细亲吻，留恋不舍。

“那一刻，没有火车，没有部队，没有战争，只有他的嘴唇紧贴在我的手指上。

”多么悲伤而美好，多么绝望而幸福的结局。

Captain Leslie为Perce创造了新的属于火车站的记忆，即便过了许多年，他对当时的细节依旧记得清清楚楚，他一提到这段，眼眶中依旧充满狂喜与爱恋。

“以爱为名，你永远活在我的记忆里。

”

说句题外话，Perce的爱人和哥哥竟分享了同一个名字。

本喵，哥哥，王尔德三个身处不同时代不同国度的同性恋者在一段故事中隔空相遇！

想到这个故事外的美丽的巧合，我简直都要热泪盈眶了。

剧本来源：BBC官方网站 搬运/侵删Queers. s01e01 Episode ScriptThe Man On the PlatformDouglas Fairbanks there thinks he's in with a chance.A bit of company on a wet Friday night.Except old Dougie doesn't have a cast in his eye and a built-up shoe.At least, not last time I was at the flickers.It's always the eyes.That's how you know.A glance held just that little bit too long, dragged off to one side, like the trail of a Very light in the dark.After the do, the, um, interview ..the officer asks me, not unkindly, I must say, "So how do you chaps, "chaps like you and the captain, know one another?" So I told him.Not my words, something somebody said to me once."A certain liquidity of the eye." That's how HE knew.My eyes are bad, mind you.Too bad for shooting Prussians at any rate, so I was shunted onto hospital work."Cushy", says Sam."That's a charabanc holiday, Perce."You always wanted to see France, didn't you?" I remember my first day in resus - the resuscitation tent.That's where they take the dying or the nearly dying and the shocked ones.There's heated beds to put some life back into them, and transfusions.Our guns were going hell for leather.The sky was all lit up - powdery, green.Horrible green.Like the air was sick.Star shells, Verys, dumps going up.And then the ambulances come in and we have to ferry them in, the ones that can't walk.And they've got these labels on them that tell you what's wrong with them.Like left luggage.Have you ever carried a stretcher? Bloody horrible.You feel like your arms are going to pop out of their sockets.Some chaps can get very heavy.Those that can walk into the hospital ..are covered in mud and salt sweat.Caked in it.All stiff and cracked, like moving statues, like those poor fuckers in Pompeii what got covered in lava.I've seen photographs of them in the lending library.And then, in the resus tent, a thing you'd never expect.Silence.Not a moan or a groan.They're beyond all that, I suppose, most of them.Smoking, breathing, just about.Mind you, I've seen what a transfusion can do and it is a bloody miracle.Lads with one foot in the grave and their pulses all thready, they have the transfusion, they're up, they're joking, they're having a smoke in a couple of hours.I said to Captain Leslie, I said, "You wouldn't credit it, would you? "It's like It's like witchcraft." "Sounds about right", he says, "since we're in hell." But he says it with a smile and when he does that there's these creases in his cheeks like ripples in the sand."You're a credit to this unit, Percy", he says to me."You've all the tenderness of a woman." And he shakes my hand."It's Terrence," he says and I says, "What is?" He says, "Me."My name.Terence Lesley."Do call me Terence."I can't bear all this formal rot." But he's an officer and it don't seem right, so, "I'll stick to Captain Leslie," I say, "if it's all the same." He just smiles again and shrugs.And his eyelashes are long.Long and blonde.I can't see much of his hair cos it's under his cap, but then one day I'm bringing in a stretcher ..and he takes his hat off and, just like that, his hair tumbles out.Yellow as corn.And I must have stared because he grins at me and pushes his hair out of his eyes and says, "Come along, Perce, stir your stumps." But I don't move.And just for a bit Well, like I say, held just a just a moment too long.Douglas Fairbanks over there will give me a wink in a minute.There you go.HE SIGHS KNOWINGLY I've always been a skinny bugger, me.Thin as a whip, Mother says.Father was the same.Mother always had a bit more beef on her after she had Albert and me, and there was one before us.A boy.But he died.He was called Percy, an' all.Poison berries.Never think a thing like that can happen, but it does.I can remember Mother showing me the pictures in the medicine book, all shiny and glossy pictures like Jesus in the book at Sunday School.And little Percy had grabbed a handful of these berries and ..that was that.Box, I think, the berries.Black, like little bullets.Like liquorice sweeties.Maybe that's what little Percy thought they was.Anyway, they done for him and then, a year or so after that, along comes I and they call me Percy, too.A bit odd, some might say, a bit morbid, but Mother always said that she could see him in me.And she looks so funny when she says that to me ..and she looks so sad.But I don't think it's just because of little Percy because there was another time she looked at me the same way.It was freezing, I remember that.We was waiting for a train.Dad had some business in Reading, I forget what it was.We were to come with and make a day of it.I was 15, thereabouts.Albert was 12.I'd been dispatched in search of tea and buns.They all sat in the waiting room, steam coming off them like wet dogs.Anyway, I'm on my way to the refreshments and there's a commotion, so I think, "Oh, the train must be coming in," so I say to the girl behind the tea stall, pretty girl I remember with bows in her hair, I ask her to get a shift on.She says, "What's the hurry? The Reading train isn't in for another "quarter of an hour." So I think, "What's all the fuss about, then?" And then I see it ahead of me on the platform.Policemen, at least I think they're policemen, but then I look properly and they're not, they're from the jail.Dark uniforms, little hats with shiny brims.And between them, well, aa prisoner ..waiting to be taken away, I suppose.And it's not the first time I've seen as such.I used to see them a lot, poor bastards, shuffling along in their chains and the arrows on their clothes.And it's rough clobber, like to make you itch, worse than this.So, "Why are all these folk whispering and pointing?" I wonder.So I look at the chap in the chains and he's a big chap, sort of like a big bear of a fella.With a big slack, pouchy face.Fat-ish, except it's all sunk in now, and his hair, which was most likely black as your hat is now shot through with grey.And he looks wretched.As well he might.There's rain dripping off his hair and down the creases in his big face.And then I realise, it's not just rain, he's bloody crying.And then he looks at me.And there it was.In that moment ..a certain liquidity of the eye.And then he looks back down at his boots and it's as if the whole world has come tumbling down around him.I stand there.And I think, "He knows me."He knows me for what I am."He can see it in me." And I start to shake.And it's not from the cold, it's shame.And fear and ..terror.And someone starts laughing.And there's a little girl and she's wandered close to the prisoner.She's got a little wooden horse on a dirty bit of string.And then her mother goes up and drags the girl away from the man as if he were like to eat her up.And then I hear it, a name.Whispered behind fancy gloves and November hands what are stiff with cold."It's him, isn't it?" And suddenly Dad's beside me and he's gripping my arm and he says, "You all right, Perce?" And he's proper worried.And there's a sort of ringing noise in my ear and I feel for a moment like I might faint, but then this chap goes straight up to the prisoner on the platform and he He spits in his face.And Dad looked shocked.And just then, the train comes puffing into the station, steam everywhere.And I look back to the prisoner, but he's covered now in a great big cloud of steam.Dad picks up the tea and the buns and he gets us into the carriage.It smells of damp wool and musty, like church, and there's little beads of rain on the window, the open window.And Mum pulls down the leather strap and the sound sort of ..snaps me out of it."What was all that fuss about there, Clem?" And Dad sups at his tea and it hangs in little drops from the ends of his Kitchener 'tashe."You won't believe it," he says."Out there on the platform, waiting to be taken to prison" "Who?" pipes up Albert.And he looks at us and he shakes his head in wonder."Oscar Wilde!" he says.And then Mum looks at me.Tender, like I've never had the nerve.That's the thing, I suppose.A notion of getting in trouble or being a bother I could always imagine Mother's face if she found out I'd been up to things.And I couldn't bear it, I couldn't bear to disappoint, so I didn't, I didn't do anything about it.Not even a tuppeny wank with Sam or nothing.I kept my own counsel, as they say.Also, there was a girl who was sweet on me.Annie.And that sort of stopped people asking, I suppose.We courted for a long while, but she got fed up because I never asked her to marry me.I took on like Annie had broke my heart and then, what with one thing or another and then the war, it sort of, somehow, I got away with it.A lot of questions, of course.Especially when all us Tommies were billeted together for the first time."You married?" "No." "You got a girl?" "Well, I used to." And then one day, in Amiens, there was a sort of lull.Hot as hell it was.Not what you think.People think of all that mud and rain, but we was there the live long year and sometimes it was hot and parched.Fucking flies everywhere.Blue and green bellies on them.Fat.Great clouds of them because of the dead bodies.And Captain Leslie comes up to me and he slaps me on the shoulder and he says, "Come along, Perce, we're going hunting." And I say, "What?" He says, "Butterflies", because we're camped on this sort of downland.And there's marigolds and poppies all over, little splashes of colour.I can still taste the dust.Chalky in your mouth and your hair and ..on the Dunlop tyres like white paint, because Terrence had only gone and got us bicycles, the silly bugger.And it was only for a few hours but you could forget, you know, for a bit, everything that was going on.And we came to this sort of lake.It was a crater hole, I suppose, and the water was glass green and clear like a perfume bottle.And Terence, he starts hollering and rattling the bike down to the water and he pulls off all his clothes and in he goes.I follows, and then we go splashing about in our birthday suits.And he's brick red from the sunshine, but not where his shirt's been, so he's got this sort of red face and arms, and the rest of him is He's like a ghost.And after we've swum about, we just lie in the grass and fall asleep.You can hear the buzz of the flies, but they are way off and some of the ones that are closer are butterflies, so that's all right, and I just ..lie there and I watch Terence sleeping and ..his Adam's apple bobbing up and down.And his hair is golden.And the line of his jaw is just sort of ..perfect.Like a draughtsman's drawn it.Like I'd drawn it.And his lips are dark and full and they're like bramble.And all I want to do is bend down and And he opens his eyes ..and squints.And he lifts his hand to cover them so he can see better.And he says, "We'd best be getting back." We all had on us the stench of death.The bread we ate, the stagnant water, everything we touched had a rotten smell.But that day, everything was OK.It was bright.And it was pure, you see? And nobody had seen, had they? I've done my bit.The officer mentioned that.Exemplary service.When he took me aside for a quiet word.And of course, what had Terence and me What had the Captain and me ..got up to? Sweet FA.But someone had seen us and ..they thought, "Hello, what's going on here?" And it's bad for morale and all of that, so I was to be sent elsewhere.And, of course, I didn't get to see the Captain, did I? Because he'd been transferred, too.I was packed onto this carriage ..sweat and tobacco smelling and fellas pushing up against you and shoving for room, and the train gives a great big lurch and then it starts off.I just sit down on the floor and pull me cap over me eyes and drift off.I don't know how much time has passed, but I wake up and it's dark outside.And the train's pulling into a station and in the carriage it's just these little night lights on - bluey.They make everyone look three-parts dead.And the train pulls into the station and it's going slow, like, puffing, like some of them boys in the resus tent.And then, I do see him.Terence.He's out the window, on the platform.Grey coat, hair tucked under his cap, neat.And he's talking to someone.And they must have made him laugh cos there's those little lines in his cheeks again.But he don't see me.So I push through the carriage past the other fellas and it's not easy now cos most have dropped off and I trip over some poor bugger and he curses me, but I make it to the window and I pull down the sash ..and the air outside is warm.And all I want to do is wave.But, of course, what can I say? Um "So long, Captain Leslie?" "So long, Perce." But then he does see me.He glances over, but he's still talking to his pal and just then the train lurches forward.The brakes go on and the blue lights go out and just like that, pitch-black.And all the other fellas in the carriage start groaning and someone says, "Oh, here we fucking go," but all I can feel is my heart beating and the air.And the darkness pressing against the window and my hand gripping the window ledge.And then someone takes my hand.Someone outside on the platform.And it's Terence.And he takes my hand and he just ..lifts it to his lips and he kisses it.There's no train then, there's no troops, there's no war.There's just his bramble lips pressed against the tips of my fingers ..and all the hair on my neck goes up on end.And then the train lurches forward and he's let go of my hand and all the blue lights go on, and Outside there's nothing but steam.Steam and darkness.Next Episode >Queers. Episode Scripts | More Television Show Episode Scripts Queers. s01e02 Episode ScriptA Grand Day OutThere's a vegetarian restaurant round the corner.You know, just round A couple of streets from here.Does completely veggie.I had a falafel.It was nice.It was OK.Did you see the news on telly last night? No, just wondered.There were some bits in the papers, I checked in WH Smiths.Tiny, you know, but that's not what I'm So, you didn't see News at Ten, no? No.Ah, shit.Oh, well.Two fellas over there.Can you believe they voted no? Can you believe it? I couldn't believe it.Yeah, well, not No, I know, but 18.You know, it's almost worse than if they'd kept it at 21.There would be some honesty in that.We hate you and, you know, piss off.At least that would have been consistent but, yeah, we'll make you slightly more equal.Yeah, well, big wow! Of course it's better, I know that, of course it is.But, well, it's just It's 1994! You know, Jesus! That's what this fella said last night.He said it was good and that things were changing but it just makes you I don't want to be tolerated, you know? I've got a bit of falafel in me teeth.It's impressive when you see it.The House of Commons.Have you been? It's bigger than it looks on telly.I just come down on my own.I wasn't planning to.I hadn't thought of it, really.I mean, I knew the vote was coming up, the reading of the bill.I've been following it, but Then it was on the front page that morning that Derek Jarman had died and, erm You know, not like it was a sign or anything, I don't believe in all that, but I just thought "Sod it.I should go." You know, show them that we count.You know, we do exist.It does matter, the things they're talking about, so I mean, I'm not a big fan or anything.I just knew he was important, Jarman.I've seen his version of The Tempest.It was the first thing I saw at the arthouse cinema back home.I never even knew they were a thing.And I taped Blue off Channel 4 a couple of months back.I haven't watched it yet.That's been the best thing about sixth form, is discovering things like that.No-one at my old school would ever have gone to something like that.Morons.There was this lad in my year, Darren Hardcastle.Daz.All he'd talk about was wanking.You know, he was obsessed.It's all he went on about.And if he wasn't banging on about wanking, he was punching people.Wanking or punching.And I used to think, "This is what prison must be like."This is like1984." I couldn't wait to leave.I ran from that place.Well, metaphorically.Well, literally.They arranged a scrap with the comp across the field.I hated it.We were outside for hours last night, shifting around, trying to keep warm.Most people were in groups, actually.I don't know if they were friends or from, you know, Stonewall, that kind of thing.There were some banners and signs and people had candles.You needed candles because of how bloody cold it was, I'm telling you.Flipping heck! And there was a weird mix of excitement because of what it was and boredom because it took ages.And this lad looked at me a few times while I was there.I saw him looking.Caught his eye.Looked back.He was You know, he was lovely.I can be a bit shy.And then finally someone come out, must have said it had been done, whatever time it was, late, come out of the House of Commons.I couldn't see who they were and then you heard everyone starting to boo and you think, "Oh" You know, because we'd been there for so long because Well, I don't know how many people there were, but enough.You know, 200.Enough for it to feel like You know, because I'm used to being on my own.I don't know anyone else who's gay.And last night, there were loads of us, and we're nice, you know, I was looking round and I was thinking, "These are nice people." And so you start to think, well, of course they'll vote the right way.Why wouldn't they? What would be the point in not? You start getting carried away with reason.And I know you shouldn't do that.And so this bloke come out and he must have said they voted 18 and everyone started to boo cos I think we had all convinced ourselves it was going to be 16, you know, it was going to be equal, so it was like a It was like a kick in the teeth.And then we all sort of surged towards the Commons, towards the doors he had come out of.It just happened and police were there, a couple on horses, that kind of thing and And people are chanting and shouting and just sort of, you know, pissed off, you know, and there is a bit of a scuffle and I did think, just for a moment, "Is this?" Because a policeman's helmet landed at my feet.Yeah, but it was nothing really, and then someone shouted, "Let's go to Downing Street," and so we all marched up there and there was some shouting outside the gates for a bit and then we all went up to Trafalgar Square and a group of people started sitting in the road to block the traffic and Well, you go along with it, but I did feel a bit You know, self-conscious, I suppose.You know, but also, like You know, because I was pissed off, too, and the police were getting a bit Well, not mardy but It was late.I think we could all tell it had run out of steam but we were angry.That's the point.And so what do you do? So we did that for, you know ..ten minutes.Then everyone went home.And then you read this morning that there were scuffles between police and a minority out to cause trouble.And there was no minority out to cause trouble, it was sopiddly.There was a bit of shoving and a bit of shouting and that's all.But to read the papers, the bit there is, you'd think it was a kind of riot.That's kind of interesting, the distortion.I've never been a part of something that's been reported before.We were all just fed up.And so I'd missed my train by this point and this fella, Marcus, that I'd been sitting in the road with, he asked if I wanted to go back to his and I thought Well, you know, but what do you do? I had nowhere to go, and so I did.That's his name, Marcus.Of course it is, sorry."Mar-cous".We went back to his, his flat, and it was You know, I mean, it was fine.It was a bit Not It was OK.I think I'd thought, and I mean, this is stupid, I know it is, but I think I'd thought people in London London is just a place, isn't it? Like any other.I suppose you think, London You know, I don't mean to sound snobby.It's not snobby.I'm not a snob.My mate Sean is proper bourgeois, though he'd have you believe he's working class because his dad, I don't know, once drained a radiator or something, but I remember his face when I told him we had our tea on our laps on Sunday watching Bullseye, so I'm not ..you know, posh.Anyway, he was asking what I did, Marcus, and I told him I was a student and he said he worked for the BBC in accounts, so that's interesting, isn't it? Kind of.And I'd said from the start that I just needed a place to stay until I could get a train home in the morning and he said that was OK.I was giving off the right vibes, I think, so Yeah, it was cool.He's a lot older than me.He's 30, but he was You know, nice.He made us some toast and put the heat on, so it was fine.He had this jam that's made without any sugar.And we talked a bit.He said he'd been on a few marches and things.You know, not just gay, but other stuff.Poll tax, and You know, so it was interesting.We talked about last night and called them bastards and put the What is it? Put the world to rights.And then he said, "Well, at least that means you're legal now." You know, because I'm 18.I mean, I'm actually 17 but I'd told him I was 18 because I thought 17 sounded a bit young.That's stupid, isn't it? And I think when he said that, I thought "Right" You know? I just kind of laughed it off and then he said he should go to bed and he went to get some bedding for me for the sofa and I think he thought I was a virgin, which I'm not, but I mean Well, I'm not not a virgin.But when he came back in the living room with the bedding ..he was starkers and I thought "Blimey!" You know, but then I thought, maybe that's just what he does.Sean, my mate, sleeps in the nude.It never occurred to me that was a thing you could do until I stopped round his.Well, a lot hadn't occurred to me until I stopped round his.But anyway, so I was sitting down on the sofa and he dropped the duvet and pillows next to me.The duvet didn't have a cover on it.The things that go through your head! You know, I thought, "Mum would never give someone a duvet "without a cover on it." So then, he was there You know, "Hello, boys!" So I'm kind of And then he reached his hand out and he stroked the back of my head, just softly, and that was actually quite nice.That sounds pathetic, doesn't it? I'm not an idiot, I knew what Well, you know, cards were on the table, but I thought, he's letting me stay over and he's not Well, he's quite nice, you know, looking, I mean.He's all right.He's not Kristian Schmidt, but So I put him in my mouth.And that seemed to go down well.And then a minute or two later he stood me up and he kissed me and I thought, "Right, I've got to decide now, "you know, if I'm not up for this, "I've kind of got to say something now "because you don't want to be rude." But I didn't say anything and so he led me through into his bedroom and he said, "Is this all right?" And genuinely, for a split second, I thought he was asking about his room, and I did think, "Well, now we know what Athena does with its remaindered stock." But he had my top off by that point and I felt kind of separate to it, like I was watching myself, you know, like Brecht - verfremdungseffekt.And I was kind of talking to myself, saying, "Is this all right? Is this OK?" You know, keeping calm.In my head, not No, I think that might have put him off.But it was just nice not to be rushed because I suppose everything I've done up till now has been at parties with lads from college who Well, you've got to sort of take advantage of the moment.I say lads, it makes it sound like there's hundreds of them, there's not, believe me, really just me and Well, just me and Jamie Flynn, I suppose.And Sean.We Not, not regularly, you know, not If he's drunk and in the right mood, and I kind of know how to be in the right place at the right time, but Well, it's an art more than it is a science and you've either got one eye on the door or worse, you've got to kind of prep yourself in case he loses the mood or after decides it didn't happen.I don't mean nasty, but just So it was really the first time it felt legitimate doing anything - you know, with an accountant! I didn't have a clue what I was doing, I'll be honest, but Well, he didn't You know, he was nice, patient.He kept talking to me and checking I was OK.I almost wished he wouldn't.I almost wanted him to just go for it.Almost.And I think, weirdly, and this feels weird now I come to think about it, but I think because I didn't madly fancy him, it meant I could relax a bit more.It didn't seem as important as it might have done.I could just do what he told me and weirdly that was kind of easier.I think I mean, it wasn't easy really, but While we were doing it I can't believe I'm telling you all this.I had a real coffee earlier.I think it's kicking in.There was a moment where I was thinking, "Two hours ago I was outside Parliament "and they were saying I wasn't allowed to do this," and that made me laugh, and that turned him on because I think he thought it meant I was getting into it, and I was getting into it, but not because of Not just because of him.I was thinking about all the tossers who'd opposed it, opposed me, and I was thinking, "If you could fucking see me now." You know, fucking And that felt great.Oh, I felt great.You know, who'd have predicted I'd spent my first time thinking about Lady Olga Maitland and Sir Nicholas fucking Fairburn.I doubt anyone's ever thought about them while they're doing it before, including the people they're doing it with, if they do ever do it, the desiccated twats.I wasn't dwelling on them.I'm not a pervert.But it did give it a A frisson.HE CLEARS HIS THROA I've never said frisson before.I've only ever seen it written down.That's one of those words, you know, like hyperbole.And then, after, he turned the light off and he held me while he fell asleep and ..all I could think was .."I hope Mum and Dad weren't watching the TV news," because At one point, when we surged towards the doors of the Commons, that's when I'd seen the cameras.They had these big lights on the top of them, the cameras.You know, like spotlights, because it was dark, obviously.I'd been trying to stay behind this big bloke in front of me so I wouldn't be seen, but he moved out of the way just at the same moment that one of them swung round and I know it got me full in the face.If that's been on the News at Ten, I'm dead.So that's why I wondered if you'd seen it.Well, I'll find out later today, you know, when I get back.I mean, I was thinking about him as well, you know, Marcus.I was thinking, "He could get in trouble for this," but But then I thought, "Yeah, but who's going to say anything?" I mean, who is? Who really cares? Quite dry, aren't they, falafels? My friend Elisa, she's a vegetarian.I mean, not just a vegetarian, she's quite fussy as well, you know, fries everything in water.She's got this Futon? No, tofu, instead of chicken.Have you tried it? I had some once.I wouldn't go mad.It's not really a substitute.He's got his hand on his leg now.Those two blokes.It's just nice to see.You know, Nottingham, there's nothing.Gatsby's, MGM the first Monday of every month.But, here Well, it's not lunchtime yet.My two hopes are that there won't be much coverage of it and that's a good bet, and that it won't be on at all, or that they will only show one or two seconds so I'll be really unlucky if I'm on it, or that Mum and Dad weren't watching last night.Or that they were watching and I was on it but they didn't see me because they won't be looking for me.They won't be expecting me to be on it.They'll think I stayed around Sean's last night.I'm kind of looking forward to telling him about it, Sean.I think I'll feel a bit better around him now.You know, it was good fun.It's funny, isn't it? Because if they'd said yes, if they had made it 16 ..then I'd have gone straight home.< Previous EpisodeNext Episode > Queers. s01e02 Episode ScriptA Grand Day OutThere's a vegetarian restaurant round the corner.You know, just round A couple of streets from here.Does completely veggie.I had a falafel.It was nice.It was OK.Did you see the news on telly last night? No, just wondered.There were some bits in the papers, I checked in WH Smiths.Tiny, you know, but that's not what I'm So, you didn't see News at Ten, no? No.Ah, shit.Oh, well.Two fellas over there.Can you believe they voted no? Can you believe it? I couldn't believe it.Yeah, well, not No, I know, but 18.You know, it's almost worse than if they'd kept it at 21.There would be some honesty in that.We hate you and, you know, piss off.At least that would have been consistent but, yeah, we'll make you slightly more equal.Yeah, well, big wow! Of course it's better, I know that, of course it is.But, well, it's just It's 1994! You know, Jesus! That's what this fella said last night.He said it was good and that things were changing but it just makes you I don't want to be tolerated, you know? I've got a bit of falafel in me teeth.It's impressive when you see it.The House of Commons.Have you been? It's bigger than it looks on telly.I just come down on my own.I wasn't planning to.I hadn't thought of it, really.I mean, I knew the vote was coming up, the reading of the bill.I've been following it, but Then it was on the front page that morning that Derek Jarman had died and, erm You know, not like it was a sign or anything, I don't believe in all that, but I just thought "Sod it.I should go." You know, show them that we count.You know, we do exist.It does matter, the things they're talking about, so I mean, I'm not a big fan or anything.I just knew he was important, Jarman.I've seen his version of The Tempest.It was the first thing I saw at the arthouse cinema back home.I never even knew they were a thing.And I taped Blue off Channel 4 a couple of months back.I haven't watched it yet.That's been the best thing about sixth form, is discovering things like that.No-one at my old school would ever have gone to something like that.Morons.There was this lad in my year, Darren Hardcastle.Daz.All he'd talk about was wanking.You know, he was obsessed.It's all he went on about.And if he wasn't banging on about wanking, he was punching people.Wanking or punching.And I used to think, "This is what prison must be like."This is like1984." I couldn't wait to leave.I ran from that place.Well, metaphorically.Well, literally.They arranged a scrap with the comp across the field.I hated it.We were outside for hours last night, shifting around, trying to keep warm.Most people were in groups, actually.I don't know if they were friends or from, you know, Stonewall, that kind of thing.There were some banners and signs and people had candles.You needed candles because of how bloody cold it was, I'm telling you.Flipping heck! And there was a weird mix of excitement because of what it was and boredom because it took ages.And this lad looked at me a few times while I was there.I saw him looking.Caught his eye.Looked back.He was You know, he was lovely.I can be a bit shy.And then finally someone come out, must have said it had been done, whatever time it was, late, come out of the House of Commons.I couldn't see who they were and then you heard everyone starting to boo and you think, "Oh" You know, because we'd been there for so long because Well, I don't know how many people there were, but enough.You know, 200.Enough for it to feel like You know, because I'm used to being on my own.I don't know anyone else who's gay.And last night, there were loads of us, and we're nice, you know, I was looking round and I was thinking, "These are nice people." And so you start to think, well, of course they'll vote the right way.Why wouldn't they? What would be the point in not? You start getting carried away with reason.And I know you shouldn't do that.And so this bloke come out and he must have said they voted 18 and everyone started to boo cos I think we had all convinced ourselves it was going to be 16, you know, it was going to be equal, so it was like a It was like a kick in the teeth.And then we all sort of surged towards the Commons, towards the doors he had come out of.It just happened and police were there, a couple on horses, that kind of thing and And people are chanting and shouting and just sort of, you know, pissed off, you know, and there is a bit of a scuffle and I did think, just for a moment, "Is this?" Because a policeman's helmet landed at my feet.Yeah, but it was nothing really, and then someone shouted, "Let's go to Downing Street," and so we all marched up there and there was some shouting outside the gates for a bit and then we all went up to Trafalgar Square and a group of people started sitting in the road to block the traffic and Well, you go along with it, but I did feel a bit You know, self-conscious, I suppose.You know, but also, like You know, because I was pissed off, too, and the police were getting a bit Well, not mardy but It was late.I think we could all tell it had run out of steam but we were angry.That's the point.And so what do you do? So we did that for, you know ..ten minutes.Then everyone went home.And then you read this morning that there were scuffles between police and a minority out to cause trouble.And there was no minority out to cause trouble, it was sopiddly.There was a bit of shoving and a bit of shouting and that's all.But to read the papers, the bit there is, you'd think it was a kind of riot.That's kind of interesting, the distortion.I've never been a part of something that's been reported before.We were all just fed up.And so I'd missed my train by this point and this fella, Marcus, that I'd been sitting in the road with, he asked if I wanted to go back to his and I thought Well, you know, but what do you do? I had nowhere to go, and so I did.That's his name, Marcus.Of course it is, sorry."Mar-cous".We went back to his, his flat, and it was You know, I mean, it was fine.It was a bit Not It was OK.I think I'd thought, and I mean, this is stupid, I know it is, but I think I'd thought people in London London is just a place, isn't it? Like any other.I suppose you think, London You know, I don't mean to sound snobby.It's not snobby.I'm not a snob.My mate Sean is proper bourgeois, though he'd have you believe he's working class because his dad, I don't know, once drained a radiator or something, but I remember his face when I told him we had our tea on our laps on Sunday watching Bullseye, so I'm not ..you know, posh.Anyway, he was asking what I did, Marcus, and I told him I was a student and he said he worked for the BBC in accounts, so that's interesting, isn't it? Kind of.And I'd said from the start that I just needed a place to stay until I could get a train home in the morning and he said that was OK.I was giving off the right vibes, I think, so Yeah, it was cool.He's a lot older than me.He's 30, but he was You know, nice.He made us some toast and put the heat on, so it was fine.He had this jam that's made without any sugar.And we talked a bit.He said he'd been on a few marches and things.You know, not just gay, but other stuff.Poll tax, and You know, so it was interesting.We talked about last night and called them bastards and put the What is it? Put the world to rights.And then he said, "Well, at least that means you're legal now." You know, because I'm 18.I mean, I'm actually 17 but I'd told him I was 18 because I thought 17 sounded a bit young.That's stupid, isn't it? And I think when he said that, I thought "Right" You know? I just kind of laughed it off and then he said he should go to bed and he went to get some bedding for me for the sofa and I think he thought I was a virgin, which I'm not, but I mean Well, I'm not not a virgin.But when he came back in the living room with the bedding ..he was starkers and I thought "Blimey!" You know, but then I thought, maybe that's just what he does.Sean, my mate, sleeps in the nude.It never occurred to me that was a thing you could do until I stopped round his.Well, a lot hadn't occurred to me until I stopped round his.But anyway, so I was sitting down on the sofa and he dropped the duvet and pillows next to me.The duvet didn't have a cover on it.The things that go through your head! You know, I thought, "Mum would never give someone a duvet "without a cover on it." So then, he was there You know, "Hello, boys!" So I'm kind of And then he reached his hand out and he stroked the back of my head, just softly, and that was actually quite nice.That sounds pathetic, doesn't it? I'm not an idiot, I knew what Well, you know, cards were on the table, but I thought, he's letting me stay over and he's not Well, he's quite nice, you know, looking, I mean.He's all right.He's not Kristian Schmidt, but So I put him in my mouth.And that seemed to go down well.And then a minute or two later he stood me up and he kissed me and I thought, "Right, I've got to decide now, "you know, if I'm not up for this, "I've kind of got to say something now "because you don't want to be rude." But I didn't say anything and so he led me through into his bedroom and he said, "Is this all right?" And genuinely, for a split second, I thought he was asking about his room, and I did think, "Well, now we know what Athena does with its remaindered stock." But he had my top off by that point and I felt kind of separate to it, like I was watching myself, you know, like Brecht - verfremdungseffekt.And I was kind of talking to myself, saying, "Is this all right? Is this OK?" You know, keeping calm.In my head, not No, I think that might have put him off.But it was just nice not to be rushed because I suppose everything I've done up till now has been at parties with lads from college who Well, you've got to sort of take advantage of the moment.I say lads, it makes it sound like there's hundreds of them, there's not, believe me, really just me and Well, just me and Jamie Flynn, I suppose.And Sean.We Not, not regularly, you know, not If he's drunk and in the right mood, and I kind of know how to be in the right place at the right time, but Well, it's an art more than it is a science and you've either got one eye on the door or worse, you've got to kind of prep yourself in case he loses the mood or after decides it didn't happen.I don't mean nasty, but just So it was really the first time it felt legitimate doing anything - you know, with an accountant! I didn't have a clue what I was doing, I'll be honest, but Well, he didn't You know, he was nice, patient.He kept talking to me and checking I was OK.I almost wished he wouldn't.I almost wanted him to just go for it.Almost.And I think, weirdly, and this feels weird now I come to think about it, but I think because I didn't madly fancy him, it meant I could relax a bit more.It didn't seem as important as it might have done.I could just do what he told me and weirdly that was kind of easier.I think I mean, it wasn't easy really, but While we were doing it I can't believe I'm telling you all this.I had a real coffee earlier.I think it's kicking in.There was a moment where I was thinking, "Two hours ago I was outside Parliament "and they were saying I wasn't allowed to do this," and that made me laugh, and that turned him on because I think he thought it meant I was getting into it, and I was getting into it, but not because of Not just because of him.I was thinking about all the tossers who'd opposed it, opposed me, and I was thinking, "If you could fucking see me now." You know, fucking And that felt great.Oh, I felt great.You know, who'd have predicted I'd spent my first time thinking about Lady Olga Maitland and Sir Nicholas fucking Fairburn.I doubt anyone's ever thought about them while they're doing it before, including the people they're doing it with, if they do ever do it, the desiccated twats.I wasn't dwelling on them.I'm not a pervert.But it did give it a A frisson.HE CLEARS HIS THROA I've never said frisson before.I've only ever seen it written down.That's one of those words, you know, like hyperbole.And then, after, he turned the light off and he held me while he fell asleep and ..all I could think was .."I hope Mum and Dad weren't watching the TV news," because At one point, when we surged towards the doors of the Commons, that's when I'd seen the cameras.They had these big lights on the top of them, the cameras.You know, like spotlights, because it was dark, obviously.I'd been trying to stay behind this big bloke in front of me so I wouldn't be seen, but he moved out of the way just at the same moment that one of them swung round and I know it got me full in the face.If that's been on the News at Ten, I'm dead.So that's why I wondered if you'd seen it.Well, I'll find out later today, you know, when I get back.I mean, I was thinking about him as well, you know, Marcus.I was thinking, "He could get in trouble for this," but But then I thought, "Yeah, but who's going to say anything?" I mean, who is? Who really cares? Quite dry, aren't they, falafels? My friend Elisa, she's a vegetarian.I mean, not just a vegetarian, she's quite fussy as well, you know, fries everything in water.She's got this Futon? No, tofu, instead of chicken.Have you tried it? I had some once.I wouldn't go mad.It's not really a substitute.He's got his hand on his leg now.Those two blokes.It's just nice to see.You know, Nottingham, there's nothing.Gatsby's, MGM the first Monday of every month.But, here Well, it's not lunchtime yet.My two hopes are that there won't be much coverage of it and that's a good bet, and that it won't be on at all, or that they will only show one or two seconds so I'll be really unlucky if I'm on it, or that Mum and Dad weren't watching last night.Or that they were watching and I was on it but they didn't see me because they won't be looking for me.They won't be expecting me to be on it.They'll think I stayed around Sean's last night.I'm kind of looking forward to telling him about it, Sean.I think I'll feel a bit better around him now.You know, it was good fun.It's funny, isn't it? Because if they'd said yes, if they had made it 16 ..then I'd have gone straight home.< Previous EpisodeNext Episode >

EP01 A certain liquidity of eye1917年，一位留着胡子，有些年龄的士兵向你诉说几段故事。

这让我顿时有种感觉，那种LGBT者互相吸引的魔力将他们的眼神凑在一起，让他们的灵魂遇到彼此。

站台上的那个王尔德消失在迷雾里，站台上缓缓松开的那只手消失在蓝色的灯光里。

就是那样一闪流光的眼神，有一种异常的坚定。

那是一个“承认自己便是罪恶”的年代，所以感触温暖成了一种奢侈。

It’s the Terence. And it’s me.EP02 That was nice1994年，一位十七岁的俊美男生，年轻气盛的精神样子。

16岁和18岁，不过两年的差值真的有那么重要么？

有，很重要，况且是对于17岁。

他身上有一股力量，青年人的冲动。

他老是说nice这个词，好像也是没有什么更贴切的词值得来形容昨晚的经历了。

尽是美好的，值得挂念的。

在最后，他低声说道“我看到了摄像机。

”我好像看到了害怕，又有一些的担心。

是在害怕父母的责怪吗？

那担心是为了什么呢？

可能是担心明年生日的到来吧。

该如何坦白这样一个真实的自己，对本人早已坦然，那对于老一代传统的眼神呢？

但相信，那一定是一次勇敢的演讲，无畏无惧。

It’s the Marcus. It’s his name.EP03 Got enough anger1987年，一位演绎了无数病人角色的演员，最后一次将死的样子。

Gay equals to ‘Got AIDS Yet?’. 人们习惯了吃着爆米花，聊着家常，假装怜惜那些大屏幕上将死的艾滋病人们。

“不过是因为脸罢了。

”不是出于对病毒的畏惧，不是出于对死亡的顾虑，而是出于对这些“怪胎”的嘲笑。

编剧刻意地隐晦着20世纪80年代的影视圈，更准确的说，是当时的普世价值观：将死之人必是同性恋，而同性恋必死。

最后一段的红蓝灯光交织在一起，给人一种似是似非的奇幻感。

他，破了诅咒啊。

AIDS绝不是Simon在厨房哭泣的理由，死亡绝不是将他们分开的魔咒。

真正可怕的是当你重新站在镜子面前，看到的自己，已经不是那个在酒吧充满笑容的你了。

你很害怕，你很软弱。

戏子演过再多的样子，也演不出自己的样子。

电影拍过再多的题材，也看不到社会的真实。

30年后的今天，想要拍这个题材的人找了个有趣的演员来呈现一个看似不沉重的话题。

但冰冷的历史就是狠狠地砸在你脚下，你要明白，愤怒是怎么来的。

It’s the Simon. He fits the bill.EP04 I'd miss you1957年，一位二婚的妻子，还有什么可留恋的。

前三集是queers自身的讲述，而这一集的旁观者视角，没有一丝的释然，没有一点的感慨。

只能哀叹历史的进程成就了一种爱情，也割裂了另一种感情。

像是历史阶段性的断层一样，总有人被落下了。

还没取名就得埋葬的孩子，还没稳定就得被人咬舌根的婚姻，Alice也向往轰轰烈烈的爱情，她也就是个普通女人而已。

作为同妻带给人的心酸让人不知道该怪谁，你该怪Michael吗？

他也害怕被旁人怀疑的眼神。

你该怪过早通过的同性恋合法化决议吗？

这次的认可已经晚了很多年了。

你该怪谁呢？

同样都是在追求爱情的自由，谁也没有错。

其实是早已自知的心情，不过是自欺欺人的借口来缓解对爱的痴求。

她知道自己身材有些虚胖，她知道丈夫半夜晚回家的意义，她知道婆婆刺眼的“安慰”早晚都会到来。

所以，放任他应得的自由，是最“残忍”的解脱。

她其实很苗条，他其实很温柔，只是他们不适合。

Michael, I’d miss you, long.EP05 I miss the secret1967年，一位白发苍苍的老人，脸上泛着阳光的耀眼。

这一集的视角看似在同性恋合法化的年代，但编剧却很tricky的选择了一位老“鸭子”的视角。

实则还是在表现几十年前禁忌的爱情。

六十年代的英国充满着逃脱禁锢的欢呼声，有人大声高歌着多年后争取来的平等，有人身体力行地表达他们的爱，有人却独自怀念着颠沛流离的年代。

在和平年代，人们往往不会想念战争。

但他却独想念苟且偷生的味道，那是每日每夜恐惧死亡后生的乐趣，那是重见阳光时候耀眼的光晕和微红的脸颊，那是在一遍遍死亡后看到天堂的样子。

久违的幸福，总来得恰是时候。

He's the god of mine. But I won’t tell you his name.

S01 The man on the platformBen Whishaw，一战故事，八集里面打头阵，看到现在最隽永动人的一个。

一战太惨烈，而以此为背景的爱情故事都平添几分摧人心肝的伤感。

法国，亚眠，战地医院，湖水，草坪，金盏花，罂粟，雾气蒙蒙的车站。

一个迷人的上尉，有着金色长睫，蓬松金发，浅浅酒窝，当他温柔的微笑，邀请你去狩猎蝴蝶，是多么难以拒绝，更何况周围是死亡围绕战火纷飞。

即使心知他是你的大司命，你也会牵住他的手。

愁人兮奈何，愿若今兮无亏。

固人命兮有当，孰离合兮可为?他美好的像一个梦，仿佛是凭空的由阳光送来，是众神的宠儿，赤足的美少年，手持金箭，即使是林中狩猎，也是那么轻灵不沾尘，与血腥无关，只是追逐花的灵魂。

看着Ben这个忧郁的士兵，视力受损，心灵受创，说不定还有PTSD，一瞬间恍惚疑惑他是否沉浸于幻想。

看他吞吞吐吐，欲言又止，疏离和沉迷转换，一时Captain一时Terrance，眼神一时滚烫一时冰凉，身不由己！

他纠结自己的出生，那个意外去世的兄长，自己贯了他的名字成为自己，身不由己；童年时偶遇雾气中狼狈的男子，对自身的了悟，仿佛是上天推了一把。

母亲忧伤的注视，男子挨的一巴掌，从此铭记在心中，谨慎度日，身不由己；遇上战争，走上屠场，身不由己；而遭遇爱和分离，更加是身不由己！

边缘人，queers，若不是颠沛流离途中，站台上，漆黑夜里，指尖上传来温柔一吻，更能用什么来慰籍平生!这是神无限的恩赐垂怜。

车行了，窗外只有雾气，他仿佛没有来过，剩下是悠悠岁月寂寂人生难测的前途和一颗惶恐的心。

爱神昭显了自己的面目，a certain liquidity of the eye，你得以一睹他的真容，他来无影去无踪 ，不过是人生站台一闪而过的身影。

酷儿们，第一集：站台上的人，一闪流光的眼神，隐秘而伟大的相识；第二集：伟大的一天，我们甚至不需要那一点看似宽容的让步，因为这一点宽容即是冒犯；第三集：多点愤怒，如果只是面对天灾而非人祸，那么愤怒应该会少点；第四集：想念爱丽丝，爱丽丝！

你应该离开的……第五集：我想念战争，想念那场战争带来的某人；第六集：城市里最安全的地方，逃避一时，终需一战；第七集：完美绅士，快乐重要吗？

自由才重要；第八集：借来之物，如果爱一定要拘泥于形式或某种结果，那不如还你。

初看完这部腐国带着回顾自己国家百年来酷儿在各个重要节点的生存状态的剧，倍感兴奋与惊讶。

一直以来，英国在戏剧方面厚重的历史传统使得这个国家在表现任何议题的时候都不会让人失望，近些年来每一部制作精良的反应性少数群体的剧都无不带着先锋性和血脉喷张式的颠覆性，来挑战权威话语，来讴歌多样，来讽刺老旧，来鼓励创新。

《酷儿们》是部充分吸收传统后极具实验性光芒的、富有政治性议程的剧。

独白，这一在各种戏剧中都会用到但在极少情况下才会大面积使用的形式，却为这部剧、为酷儿们完成了极具生命力的呈现。

回顾莎翁的戏剧，独白总会在人物面临道德选择与人性矛盾挣扎的时候登场，灯光昏暗，时间静止，人物直接与自己对话，与观众对话——拷问，纠结，惶恐，畏惧，癫狂，无奈——独白用着最朴素的形式与装束，担负着最有感染力与表现力的使命：在麦克白杀害生灵后对人生的无意义进行反思时，在李尔王面临众亲抛弃颠沛流离时，在理查三世因为自己的畸形而被嫌弃表现自己的愤恨与不得志时，在苔丝狄蒙娜为女性的地位深感不公时，独白便上场了，一整段的心理倾诉与告白，裹挟着汹涌的穿透力与共情力，让观众看到了独白者多面的内心世界，有时还会呈现出与这些角色之前舞台上的通过动作和其他对话所表现出的性格特征所不太相同的心理活动。

是的，我想《酷儿们》敢于使用如此简单质朴却又富有力量的形式，在某种程度上是因为独白在表现复杂人性方面的优势：就像听一个老朋友对于一段感情的描述，就像一个在听陌生人将他身上的幸与不幸，也就像在听我们自己的现在、过去亦或是未来。

在接受这样的独白时，我们或者开门见山，或者迂回萦绕，不需要剧情的推动，不需要特效的辅助，不需要配乐的升华。

我们所接受的，只有文字和分享所带来的感染力。

这样的面对面，虽然在这样的时代容易被理解成无聊，但总保留着一份难得的真诚与贴近。

所以，这八个人的讲述中，除了带有点醒主题式的语言外，我觉得最有感染力的部分便是他们对于生活和感情中细节的回忆与描述。

这样的感染力，通过镜头语言当然可以完成，但这样面对面式的独白，完成的是人与人之间最简单也是最重要的一种沟通形式。

这种形式，提供了进一步理解的通道。

酷儿们的生活，才会得到更温情的展现。

是的，独白可以在某种程度上更好地体现人的复杂性，但我们在倾听他人讲故事的时候，永远不是被动接受，也永远不可能全盘接受，而是在这样的倾诉与接收之间，告知与被告知之间，灰色地带总会存在——他说的是真话吗？

我一定要相信他吗？

他在讲这些事情的时候，主观的角度是否让他变得偏激与不实？

他所流的泪是否是真的？

他的倾盆而出又有何目的？

换句话，任何讲述者都或多或少带着一些“不可靠性”。

我想，写到这里，有些人或许会讲，独白的真诚与“不可靠性”，这样的矛盾岂不是在削弱着这部剧的艺术性？

我的理解是，正是由于独白自身的矛盾性，这部剧才更加适合体现那一个个矛盾的“酷儿们”。

就像这部剧第三集小狼的叙述一样，酷儿们在文艺作品的展现实在容易被“程式化”、“固态化”、“政治正确化”，类似的情节，类似的人物安排，类似的角色命运使得“酷儿们”这一特殊的群体在某些时候总以一个特定的面呈现出来。

反而那些留守在话语中心的人，非酷儿们，“主流”人士们，却不断地在用新手法、新情景、新情节、新性格来展现。

记得《卫报》在点评前几年的性少数戏剧《香蕉》、《黄瓜》和《豆腐》时，也总在强调我们需要更多gay drama的必要性——只有更多，才能有更丰富的角色塑造的可能；只有直面问题，才能有解决问题的可能。

因而，在某种程度上，“独白”也是在为酷儿们争取一个站在中心当作讲述者的位置，在这个位置上，人性的复杂可以得到更加淋漓尽致的体现，酷儿们也可以有机会变得自相矛盾。

而这样的自相矛盾，不正是一种有血有肉，不正是一种你我共有的存在体征吗那当我们谈论酷儿的时候，我们到底在谈论些什么？

我们在讨论酷儿们在文艺作品中的展现需要多样化（所以本部剧先锋性了用了独白的形式来丰富酷儿们的呈现），我们在讨论性取向与阶级、种族、国籍、性别等各个变量之间的互动关系（所以我们在本部剧里看到了不同的年龄、性别、种族、阶级的讲述者），我们在讨论酷儿们的平权历史，我们在讨论酷儿们首先作为一个鲜活、也有弱点、也有偏颇、也会傲娇、也会无力与恐惧的人会是什么样子……这样的讨论，没有终结。

也不该有终结。

所以，我们在看这部剧的时候，会时常感到困惑与不解，似乎没有一个清晰的主线，似乎没有一个十分明亮的信息，似乎没有一个主旋律。

因为酷儿理论的代表人物Judith Butler曾在性别麻烦一书中用非常哲学化的语言说过，当不合此时常规的性别特征和呈现被操演许多次时，不合常规与合常规的界限便已经开始模糊化，人们就会发现所谓的“常规”只是一种幻想式的存在，没有实质性的存在。

因而，《酷儿们》这部剧所想要实现的讨论，我觉得是带着“永不清晰”、“永不终结”的美感的。

只有这样永不停息的操演与讨论，常规才会开始失去压抑的力量。

平权才会有实现的可能。

所以，回到《酷儿们》这部剧，它就是在用一种先锋式的手段完成着一次属于酷儿们的“操演”，在当下强调大制作、大画面、大冲突的文艺作品制作理念下，它用朴实的独白将观众带回英国典雅的酒吧里，静静地，听那些人，微微醉着，讲属于他们自己的故事。

ps.题外话。

其实看完这部剧，内心得到的慰藉很大。

这个剧表现了英国这个国家用了一个世纪所实现的东西，其实在侧面也在讲述，任何权利的实现，都不是一蹴而就的。

这需要许多人流泪流血甚至付出生命。

回看中国，我们似乎仍然经历得有些少。

这条路对于我们真的还很长，但我觉得没关系，我相信在未来的某个日子，也会有像《酷儿们》这样的剧，讲述着我们这代人的故事。

这样一想，真的宽慰了不少。

E01 The Man On the PlatformYou can hear the buzz of the flies, but they are way off and some of the ones that are closer are butterflies, so that's all right.and I just lie there and I watch Terence sleeping and his Adam's apple bobbing up and down.And his hair is golden.And the line of his jaw is just sort of perfectLike a draughtsman's drawn it.Like I'd drawn it.And his lips are dark and full and they're like bramble.And all I want to do is bend down and And he opens his eyes and squints.And he lifts his hand to cover them so he can see better.And he says, "We'd best be getting back.There's no train then, there's no troops, there's no war.There's just his bramble lips pressed against the tips of my fingers .E02 A Grand Day OutIt's funny, isn't it? Because if they'd said yes, if they had made it 16 .then I'd have gone straight home.E08 Something BorrowedFrom that, the last one left standing, unpicked at PE, the saddo sitting out the school disco slow dances because he couldn't wrap his arms round the one he wanted, the teenager looking for love in pissy public toilets and parks after dark .To this.Respectability.Propriety.Decorum.And then he said, gentle as anything, and I'm not going to do the accent. "If there's a gay kid in here with his folks, frightened that he's a freak, don't you think that it might give him hope, seeing two guys wandering around, being themselves, getting their groceries, like everyone else?" If happiness is a place, it's the biscuit aisle in Sainsbury's.And anywhere else I am with him.And the best view ever isn't Uluru, or Iguazu, the Taj Mahal, the Grand Canyon, or even Edinburgh as seen from Arthur's Seat on a clear autumn day with the Forth shimmering in the distance.It's the nape of his neck when he's lying asleep in my arms.I know we don't get happily ever afters in real life.I'm a hopeless romantic, not a total fucking idiot.As my friend, Russell, said to me once, "Even with the happiest couples, one of you dies first." But first there is such unalloyed joy.BBC的选题策划，编剧的剧本台词，演员的表演张力。